“Ashen yarr, chal yarr!!!”

Me: “Kahan… abhi to ek mahina nahi hua! That’s how it should be... a one month break just helps me realign my creative thought processes and… you know...”

The Crab: “Blah blah. That’s all you do. Its been more than a month. And these breaks are NOT good. Neither for the blog, nor for your so called creative thought processes.”

“It’s been rainy lately, right? And to add to that, the Flu. So why don’t you have a hot cup of tea and rest your claws till its time to say hi to the sun?”

“That’s all I have been doing. And in some time, I will rust my claws waiting for someone to condescend to write something which makes sense.”

“You and your crabby taunts.”

“Am a crab. I jolly well be crabby!… Just like.. ”

“Yeah yeah. Just like I am a blogger and I jolly well be blogging…”

“There you go... :)”

*******************************************************************************

As Shahid Kapoor rattatats to the booming music and does his dil nichoding and raat ki matki phoding on the TV, I sit with a laptop in front and go clickety clackety commenting on how some arbit strategy saved the revenues of a well known retail brand group. So that’s how exciting it can get.

NSG’s lying on the sofa, with his left leg touching its arm at the end and the right leg folded so that his knee rests on the wall the sofa is set against. In that posture, it seems as if he is going to run into the air in the next few minutes. But he obviously wont. Cause its Sunday. People relax on Sunday. Ahem, at least most of'em do...

Somewhere, Rakhi’s getting married with her botoxed facial muscles stretched into a poor proxy for a smile. Somewhere, a group of wannabes have been packed off to a jungle (sadly not to my favorite tropical rainforests of Africa) so that they could revisit their animal instincts. Somewhere all the pigs of the world are wondering how humans have suddenly grown green, white and yellow snouts overnight. Here’s Mr. Shahid head-banging to the jingly bingly club song that’s on everyone’s mind nowadays. But do all this matter to the Crab? Doesn’t seem so.

The adventurous Crabby was on the Sea Link the very day where they predicted the highest tide in Mumbai in 100 years. Lately, she was found loitering around in all the malls in Mumbai studying the zoning and circulation strategies adopted.. just around the time when face masks were about to be launched as accessories matching the dress you wear, thanks to the You-Know-What-Flu. I mean, she’s in all the wrong places at all the wrong times. The next time you hear from her, she would be on top of the Everest, trying to analyze the real estate opportunities in the unexploited mound of land, on the very day a meteor would be expected to hit the Earth. So when, the whole world would have dug trenches and hid inside the deepest basements in the safest places, the Crab would be standing at the highest place on Earth possible, wondering what just swished past her. Uh-Ohh.

Batao. Pet ke liye kya kya karna padta hain. Not the bow wow wala pet, silly!

But today morning, I had made my mind to liberate my creative brain cells and think of something other than brands, retail hubs, rentals and square feet areas. Have been really trying hard to write a piece of story. And that’ll be up here as soon as I get a hang of what to write about. Heh.

Till then, hugs & praises to all those who wrote throughout this evil stretch of time. And back pats and empathies to those who could not.

P.S: I was at High Street Phoenix (Mall) the other day and saw a long line of masked people, the crowd being managed by volunteers with a rope (for better flow of customer traffic and avoid chaos). Just as I was wondering why the so called up market High Street would volunteer for the testing of You-Know-What-Flu, I realized there is only one thing on Earth that can beat the paranoia attached to all the likes of flus, SARS and even Anthrax. The Big Bazaar Sale!